trust issues

i believed you once
when you told me i was special
you repeat them again and again
like a never ending song
you said we could be more
allowing time to do its thing
and i waited again and again
like a never ending chase

i believed you once
for i didn’t want to live a lie
one moment your world was me
belonging to the galaxy of stars
but later, your world was hers
stealing what was once ours
i was not foolish to wait
nor trust for i believed you once

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child, that’s not love

breathe in, breathe out
suck in all the nervousness
gather all the anxiety
then release them out
repeat

the heart beats a little faster
cheeks turning pink, no —scarlet
he’s here! he’s here

breathe in, breathe out
repeat

but that’s not love
these are merely feelings
a liking; an attraction
the excitement, the anticipation
these will fade
they will

because love is not a feeling
it is —instead— a choice
on whether you’re willing
to be committed (for a lifetime)
to be vulnerable (to hurt and pain)
to sacrifice (money, time, so much more)
for this person you dearly like

things go well at the beginning
thinking that this responsibility is easy
oh so wrong, so so wrong
not even two steps ahead of the starting line
and we say something so foolish
we laugh at our innocence in the future

it’s a liking, an attraction
this is simply an infatuation
whether reciprocated, it will fade
it will

trust me —i’ve been there
i was once just like you
(and they were once just like me)

 

dreaming of the impossible

Is it possible for love to be distributed so equally?
Human’s imperfection fails to make things just
I’ve already foreseen this, yet you told me no
You will not forsake me like the other did so
But it has happened and will happen again
To interrupt your happy world I’ll refrain
Time is up, let’s face it –you do not care
Your love for me diminishes in the air
I will search for a place called home
A spare room or my lover’s arms
As long they’re willing to love
As long they’re eager to care
Except here in everywhere,
I’ll go places high and low
So that I learn and grow
I won’t be coming back
By then my love lacks
To you who stopped
And have brought
Disinterest, woe
Enkindling the
Heartaches
& sorrows.

keep them hidden

the most fragile weakness
the most desirable desire
the most foolish dream
the most horrific nightmare
perhaps these are the secrets we keep among ourselves

a nightmare gone real, carving a scar
displaying a new-found fear and flaw
what that is lost now becomes a crave
we build a fantasy that makes us safe
perhaps these secrets form like a chain of events

because of the imperfections we all own
fragments of your secrets may be known
for as nasty, crooked human beings we are
our own curiosity pushes us a little too far
digging up one’s past and searching for clues
just to know why and what made you, you
perhaps this is the reason we should keep them hidden

always

as it is

what else is there to explain about love?
why bring science into such a beautiful thing?
emotions, expressions, deeds —compassion
love is love
there’s no other explanation
let it be as it is

silent struggles

lips sewn shut, pursed into a solemn smile
as disagreements form silently in the head
for the harmony between two individuals is
more important than this Passive’s opinion

yet beware of those who speak their minds
they strip off the Passives’ dignity with pride
braver Passives fight back for the first time
but most still remain in their passive state

this battle now created inside their hearts
whether to defend or remain to persevere
it is a vicious cycle that keeps on running
only to be stopped by Passives themselves

the battle within you

dashing into the trees of the dense forest
running away from the world and its tremors
succumbed into your doubts and insecurities
as you broke the ice, plunging into the water

where were you when she needed you the most?
in the middle of a tangled mess you have made
crouched in a corner, shielded from the world
but the problem has always been within you
no point of fleeing -it follows you without fail

break down your walls, breathe in humility
mend your broken heart with forgiveness
start gathering your guts and fix things
it takes two to clap

(and she can’t do much more)