silent struggles

lips sewn shut, pursed into a solemn smile
as disagreements form silently in the head
for the harmony between two individuals is
more important than this Passive’s opinion

yet beware of those who speak their minds
they strip off the Passives’ dignity with pride
braver Passives fight back for the first time
but most still remain in their passive state

this battle now created inside their hearts
whether to defend or remain to persevere
it is a vicious cycle that keeps on running
only to be stopped by Passives themselves

the battle within you

dashing into the trees of the dense forest
running away from the world and its tremors
succumbed into your doubts and insecurities
as you broke the ice, plunging into the water

where were you when she needed you the most?
in the middle of a tangled mess you have made
crouched in a corner, shielded from the world
but the problem has always been within you
no point of fleeing -it follows you without fail

break down your walls, breathe in humility
mend your broken heart with forgiveness
start gathering your guts and fix things
it takes two to clap (she can’t do much more)

if you love her so, quit escaping from her grasp
if you love her so, run back to her arms again
if you love her so, overcome your own setbacks
if you love her so, stand by her side and remain
there is full of hope within her as she waits

be in the bliss

rash decisions bring good things too
who cares about what people think?
as long as in this spur of the moment
you and i are happy with each other
and that’s all we should care about
though with every bliss comes misery
let’s not think about this for tonight
now we reflect on the contentment
like the kisses under the moonlight


we’re gonna take away the sorrow;

 

this is what it is

this is what it is
they expect us to deal with it
and so we did and we still do
but they look at us weirdly
thinking we don’t seem right

this is what it is
a badly destroyed childhood
with a glimpse of terror too soon
even when we struggled growing up
we are still frowned upon

this is what it is
bottled up thoughts and feelings
excessive crying at twelve a.m.
making everything seem okay
because we hate being pitied

this is what it is
with never a clear understanding
about love, happiness, and family
we stopped believing in fairy tales
at such an early age

this is what it is
forced to answer such questions
when reminiscing brings such pain
being the ‘it’ subject of whispers
we just act like it doesn’t hurt

this is what it is
we are simply innocent victims
expected to blend into the rest
despite reoccurring nightmares
and the everlasting emptiness
but this is what it is

Mr. Grudge

like a Burr seed attached to one’s clothes
his arms are tight for he never lets me go
despite how much i wanted us to be apart
Mr. Grudge stubbornly clings onto my heart

and when i thought Mr. Grudge actually left
i crossed paths with Lady and he came back
together with his friends who make me sick
they dance along to the pulmonary beat

there was Miss Envy who shakes me awake
adding ingredients that spark up the hate
and Madame Despise who darkens my soul
so that when i’m with Lady, i’ll turn cold

sometimes an angel sits on my shoulder
telling me that Lady isn’t entirely wrong
i tried hard to reason it out, saying that:
Mr. Grudge is exceedingly too strong

he conquers both my heart and mind
i cannot love nor to Lady ever be kind
many remedies failed –he wouldn’t budge
so how do i get rid of clingy Mr. Grudge?

hush,

don’t speak about your dreams

the menacing voices will sneak
and pounce to attack, to torment
to tell you that you’re no good for it
to say that it isn’t suitable for you

the young age shows you’re brittle
and your own dreams you shatter
upon hearing those haunting words

no point fighting back nor justifying
for their stubborn ears refuse to listen
your best support comes from your own will
so work hard to make your dreams a reality

but do it in secret, as voices will lurk
to destroy hopes, stumbling dreamers
shield your dreams, hug them tight
and nothing can ever defeat you

inside the examination hall

in maroon sneakers he rushed in
and sat on the desk beside me
time ticking, legs of the chair
scraping the cemented floor

we started without him
already scribbling in blue
when he just started reading
the instructions and passage

sweat beaded his forehead
eyebrows scrunching as the
pen quickly formed strokes
hurry, not much time left

a drop of a ballpoint pen
which shattered the silence
was rolling towards a leg
of the desk belonging to me

should i?

too late.

i heard footsteps nearing,
bones cracking as the aged
teacher bends down to reach
for the common writing tool

surprised that the teacher
knew who the owner was
he set the object on his desk
instead of mistaking it for mine

and so the boy retrieved his lost pen
but i lost the chance to get him to notice me