Mr. Grudge

like a Burr seed attached to one’s clothes
his arms are tight for he never lets me go
despite how much i wanted us to be apart
Mr. Grudge stubbornly clings onto my heart

and when i thought Mr. Grudge actually left
i crossed paths with Lady and he came back
together with his friends who make me sick
they dance along to the pulmonary beat

there was Miss Envy who shakes me awake
adding ingredients that spark up the hate
and Madame Despise who darkens my soul
so that when i’m with Lady, i’ll turn cold

sometimes an angel sits on my shoulder
telling me that Lady isn’t entirely wrong
i tried hard to reason it out, saying that:
Mr. Grudge is exceedingly too strong

he conquers both my heart and mind
i cannot love nor to Lady ever be kind
many remedies failed –he wouldn’t budge
so how do i get rid of clingy Mr. Grudge?


word barf #3: perfection

she is perfect. 

with hair dip-dyed an odd, vibrant colour, she still looks beautiful. heels do not need to boost her height (the ideal dreamed by all women) and her waistline is at par with the mannequins in retail stores. 

she owns a personality so lovable, attracting new friends near and far. she has a voice which is soothing when she comforts, melodious when she sings, and unique when she laughs. her hands hold the many talents she possesses, in music, in culinary, as well as in visual art. the level of confidence she has made her outshine every other girl. she stands out, not like a sore thumb, but like the tallest, prettiest wildflower in the meadows. 

she lives the life in the comforts of her own home and loving family. the number of friends she has exceeds the total digits of her fingers and toes. she has everything and she will get anything she wishes for with her hard-to-achieve qualities like being hardworking, kind, forgiving, patient-

-heck, nobody can find a single flaw in her. you cannot hate her because there is nothing to hate her for. she is so perfect, so bloody perfect, the most perfect girl by far.

perhaps it is all just a facade. she could be hiding the dents, the scars, and the intentions which are frowned upon by society. whatever it is, she hid them well, an excellent keeper! perfection is a hoax.

i guess we are all creating our own semblance so society will not shun us away. no man can live as an island, so the desire for acceptance has always been part of human nature. if there isn’t any desire, trends would not exist. geez, what a bummer.

when they tell you to be yourself, did they mean to be my true self? my truest self? no one would like the original, purest, harrowing form of me. eureka! i found the flaw we all own: we’re simply fake among our own kind. no matter how many layers between the world and yourself you have taken off in front of an individual, there are still a number left that masks the true, true you.

((i know this is such a silly post but i’m writing my trashy thoughts out before i forget them perpetually.))